Homeschooling Boys

“Stop talking to each other and do your work!”, has been a common phrase at my house. Since I made the choice to homeschool my 13 and 8-year-old boys this past fall, things have indeed been quite stressful yet fun at the same time. If you haven’t already figured it out, my boys are a few years apart, making things more challenging. They are both entirely different people with entirely different needs. Talk about a scary thing to pursue. I was about to become their educator, and I didn’t even have any training!

The first thing I learned on day 1 of homeschooling was that it is impossible to stick to a schedule. This is homeschooling, not regular school where an agenda must be met daily. Before we started, I laid out an entire schedule to the minute of what subject we would do and when, what time breaks would be, and how long they would last. I even designed a reward chart for my 8-year-old with prizes and stars – the works! I had all the stickers. I learned within the first hour that a detailed schedule wouldn’t work. I accepted it, embraced it and I am none the happier. The reward chart didn’t last long either. My son struggles with not-so-great behavior, and prizes didn’t entice him to do better.

The second thing I learned was to admit when I need help. My teen just started high school and was taking pre-algebra. The curriculum I bought him had only the answers to the problems (for me to see) and zero explanation on how to get to the answer. Disclaimer: I failed five college math classes before I got it right haha, so I had no idea how to teach math! We would sit there for hours. My son would sit there with me while I looked like an idiot trying to figure out what I was doing so I could teach it to him. It wasn’t working and he was far behind. My pride stuck with me though and I refused to change it. I told myself I would stay up all day and night to learn it first. Finally, I succumbed to my prideful ways and reached out to our co-op for help. Other parents gave me suggestions on what they use for their kids. I spent a lot of money on a math curriculum, but it was a game changer for my son and me. I don’t have to do a thing! It relieved so much stress. My point is, don’t be afraid to ask for help. It is not a weakness, it is a strength. It is a strength because not only are you showing your kids that it’s okay to admit when you need help, but you are doing the best possible thing for them in doing so.

Thoughts of the past-Part I

The sky is dark today, even though light shines through. In my mind, thoughts of self-doubt, worthlessness, and grief embody me. Something inside me wants to push its way out, but can’t. Not all of my childhood was bad, but most of it was. Navigating through emotional abuse, neglect, and social barriers has molded me into the woman that I now am and I am not sure if I like who I have become. I am using this blog as a therapeutic supplement. My goal is to explore my deepest thoughts and revisit my past to bring healing to myself and possibly encourage other readers along the way.

One might say “happiness is where the home is”, but for me, happiness was anywhere else but home. A child usually dreads school days and can’t wait to come home after sitting in classes for hours five days a week and weekends are filled with fun with family, friends, trips, sports games, and any other activity you could imagine. For me, it was the opposite. I loved attending school, hated weekends, and cried when summer vacation came. Fear lingered with me whenever I stepped foot in my home; if you could call it home.

Grief is what I feel today. Grief of what never was, and will never have.